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Part 3 – Chronic Pain and Depression

First, an apology. This third part of the series, “Chronic Pain and Depression,” should have been written and posted a long time ago. Unfortunately, LIFE got in the way and I’m just now writing and posting it! There are so many events coming up that have kept me from posting on this blog in the professional manner that I should. Therefore, I’m committing to writing something on this blog at least weekly and then move it up to every day. The next post will give more details about what is going on and how it is affecting my Chronic Pain.

But now, let’s finish our series on Chronic Pain and Depression…

As you begin your relationship with your therapist these are items to consider after your meeting(s). If there is ever a question in your mind about the therapy you are receiving, stop and seek out a new therapist – for peace of mind if nothing more. Your mind will give you warning signals if:

37.  During the session, your therapist answers his phone. (Not professional! This is time you are paying for!)

38.  As you talk about your culture or religion, your therapist throws insensitivity comments your way.

39.  Denying or ignoring the importance of your spirituality is another warning signal from your counselor.

40.  Your therapist tries to push her thoughts or convictions regarding spirituality or religion onto you.

41.  You find your therapist doesn’t empathize at all.

42.  Or, your therapist empathizes too much.

43.  As you talk about your problems, your counselor appears overwhelmed. You begin to feel like you are abnormal with so many problems. Not true! It’s time to start looking elsewhere.

44.  Your feelings or issues make your therapist overly emotional, affected or triggered. 

45.  Against your wishes, you are pushed into highly vulnerable feelings or memories.

46.  Or, you find your therapist avoids exploring your emotional or vulnerable feelings.

47.  Your permission is not asked when your therapist begins using various psychotherapeutic techniques with you.

48.  Without helping you to appreciate and resolve the underlying causes, your counselor tries to get you to exert overt control over your impulses, compulsions, or addictions.

49.  Instead of teaching you coping skills to manage your impulses, your therapist prematurely or exclusively focuses appreciating and resolving the underlying causes you have with an issue or compulsion.

50.  Your therapist is consistently late for your appointment. Signs of canceling or missing your appointment on a consistent basis is another warning sign.

Those conclude the 50 Warning Signs to look out for during your first few appointments with a therapist. Some of these signs may not show up until you are well into a therapy program. When you feel uncomfortable with the lack of progress or the overt pressure you receive from your therapist, ask your doctor for another recommendation. There is no time limit on switching therapists.

It is better to adhere to the warning signs your brain picks up on rather than do nothing and become trapped within your therapist’s expectations or program. You should not be forced into doing anything you don’t feel comfortable doing.

I hope this three-part series has given you some enlightenment and permission to move to another therapist. When I read this article online at GoodTherapy.org it helped me to understand the reasoning behind a family member’s actions. The problem is if your loved one has succumbed to questionable therapy, there isn’t anything you can do about it. It is the person’s choice to continue with the therapist and all you can do is hope he/she will eventually see the therapy given was incorrect.

Thanks for reading and if you know of other “warning signs,” please be sure to let the author know them at the link for Good Therapy.

Carolyn